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The Dubai story

So we're in Dubai for a few days en route to Taiwan… I used to live in Dubai, pre-husband and pre-kids. Whenever I come here I have flashbacks of my life here. Recently my friend Gina showed me an email I had sent her while I was living here, and I thought it was appropriate to share this story…

Typical Dubai story:

So my car registration and insurance needs to be renewed so I call and they give me a quote and say to me to bring the exact amount in cash. They say I can come do the insurance then go next door to get my registration done. So I go to the bank and then the insurance office first thing in the morning. When I get there the quote seems to have increased by AED250. I tell them no, let me call the guy who quoted me, so they speak to the guy, hang up the phone, re-calculate and now they tell me it's just AED150 more. So I said no, it shouldn't be anything more, when I get a quote for something, I expect that when I come to sign the contract, the quote hasn't changed overnight. So he says 'fine, don't worry, I'll pay for it'. I said no, don't be ridiculous, I don't want you paying for it I just want what I was quoted. Next second he tells me oh, he was wrong, the amount is actually what I was quoted. WHAT THE HELL!?
Then he asked me to sit as he will print out the contract. 45min later I am sooooooo annoyed, I ask him if there's a problem? And he says 'Yes, the printer is broken'. WELL WHEN WERE YOU PLANNING TO TELL ME THAT!?!?' And he says the printer is broken so I have to come back tomorrow. I basically say excuse me, are you crazy? Then he says, 'Don't worry, your insurance only expires in November'. So I said yes but my car registration expires in 2 days and I need to renew my insurance for them to renew my registration. So he says ok, but don't worry. I said, excuse me, but what do you mean by 'don't worry'?. Oh, because they only fine you AED10 per day for late registration. I was like, WELL THAT'S NOT THE POINT, I AM NOT DOING ANYTHING LATE, I AM HERE TO GET EVERYTHING DONE AND YOU CANT GIVE ME MY INSURANCE CAUSE YOUR PRINTER DOESNT WORK!? So he says 'Oh yes, sorry, please come back tomorrow'.

Typical Dubai story part 2:

So I wake up early, go to the insurance place, I walk in and straight away the guy says to me 'it's all ready, don't be angry!'. Yah whatever, I see the documents and again the price is different. Only like AED100 but out of principal I'm like, what the hell!? He says fine, he'll pay himself the difference. I said fine, pay it. F*cker. Then I go to RTA (car registration) which is in the Toyota showroom. The local woman is busy having coffee with a local guy, so I'm sitting there like a retard, without getting served. I'm huffing and puffing but they just take their time chit chatting. Finally she decides she will attend to me….. On the phone they had told me that because it's a 2008 model, I don't need the car to be checked. Now I get there and the computer system says I need a checking. As in, 'the computer says noooooooooooo….'. So I go to Toyota and then they say oh, strange, 2008 shouldn't need checking, go to RTA. I say I was just sent from there you bloody morons. So he comes with me to RTA and the woman shows him the computer which is still saying 'nooooooooooo'. So back to Toyota to get the car checking. They say to me, oh, do you know about the new rule whereby all cars need a reflective triangle before being approved? I just look at them with disbelief. Anyway they send me down the road to go and buy one at the hardware shop (why the f*ck don't they sell them there if its a requirement!?!?.) Ok, its only down the road but its about 40 degrees, humid and I'm in a work dress & heels. Get there, buy the thing, and its like 5kg, my hand is about to fall off. Get back to Toyota, my whole back & face is drenched of sweat, and they look at me like, what have you bought!? So I look at them and say 'don't even tell me I bought the wrong thing!!??' I suddenly thought that maybe I bought an orange cone or something by mistake!!! I said listen, there's no chance in hell I'm walking back there!!! They say no but I bought like this massive pack, with THREE triangles in!? I paid AED119 instead of AED35 which should be the price. So I start trying to sell my 2 spare triangles at the show room to other customers who are unaware of this 'new rule'. I managed to sell one! Back to RTA, they finally stamp it and say go pay at the cashier and come back. The cashier is at the way other end of the building. WHY!?!?
I walked out of there and booked a Thai massage for tonight.